I get up, put the coffee on, get dressed and ready for work. Cook breakfast (maybe). Take food out of the freezer for tonight. Wake up my husband. Why is it I’m waking him up? He’s a grown man!
Off to work. I like my work. it is a way to get out of the house and use my brain. Not sure I like the hours and lack of flexibility, though.
I need to remember to pick up the dry cleaning before I go to my charity board meeting. So much for cooking dinner tonight. I’ll pick up some fast food on the way home from my meeting.
Dinner at 7:30 pm. I really hate eating so late. At this rate, I’ll never get rid of the extra 15 pounds I’ve put on over the years. No matter what I do, it seems to stick to me. It is depressing to see how my body is changing with age. Yuck! I have good intentions of exercising on a regular basis. I’m just too tired by the time I get out of work, serve on my charities, take care of the house, and do the laundry. I don’t even have the energy or desire to play around with my husband any more.
DOES THIS SOUND LIKE YOU? If so, this article is for you.
The kids are grown and out of the house. You’d think there would be more time for yourself now. However, you are still in the mode of doing for others. It is an ingrained belief that as a woman, it is up to you to be the nurturer. That is the belief instilled in our generation, the Baby Boomers.
Pre, during, and post menopause has you looking at your life, wondering what you are to do now. You’ve spent your whole life taking care of the family and never having enough time for yourself. Now you take up your time with charities and other organizations. You enjoy doing this, however, you still keep putting yourself last.
Isn’t it time for you to Take The Time to do for you? Isn’t it time to put yourself first? All you have to do is get into a habit of taking care of YOU. You get to switch your belief and realize it is OK for you to do what you enjoy. It’s OK take a few minutes each and every day to do something special for YOU. It doesn’t have to be much. Maybe it’s 5 minutes, twice a day, meditating so you can feel more relaxed and calm. Meditation supports your mind and body to Bee Healthy and Happy. You will enhance your memory, be more focused, and calm.
Schedule 30 minutes or more to read, journal, or exercise. During menopause your body changes, so the more you do to feed your body with healthy foods and exercise, the better you’ll feel. Schedule it so you create a habit.
I found I had to commit to a schedule to make a habit, whether it was going to the gym before or after work, committing to stay off sugar, or meditating and journaling. Once I got into the habit, it became easier for me to keep up the “Me Time”.
Get a buddy to support you in creating your “Me Time” and you can support them in their “Me Time”. Have fun with it. Know you deserve to have fun and do for yourself. You’ve spent your whole life doing for others and now it is time for you to do for you. It is OK for you to put yourself first.
I know when I was in my 40’s, someone asked me “What do you want for you?” It took me 3 weeks to even come up with something. My life was work, kids, husband, house. I never took the time to think about me and what I wanted. I didn’t even know how to put myself first.
It was a struggle to realize it was OK for me put myself first. I had to get rid of the belief that I was being selfish if I wanted to do something for me, instead of cleaning the house or fixing dinner. It took a while to figure out how I could have a happy home and a happy me. First I had to be honest with myself and recognize how I felt, then I had to learn how to communicate those feelings with others in the household.
I had to learn to express my desires and wants so I could feel good about myself. Once I was able to communicate what I wanted, I was able to work with the family and get their support in taking on more of what I thought was up to me to get done. All I had to do was ask and let them know how I felt. I became Vulnerable. Wow, was that a challenge.
It is a matter of allowing others to take care of themselves and it doesn’t have to look the way you think it does. Let go of needing to control how something needs to be done and look, so you can enjoy YOU. After you get to be a certain age, you will realize the little things aren’t as important as they used to be. It’s ok for dust to be on the furniture and the floors don’t need to be cleaned EVERY day. So what if the bed HE made isn’t the way you would make it.
Relax, have fun. It is time for you to put yourself first so you can enjoy yourself!
We would love to hear from you, please leave a comment in the comment section below!
Cheri Hickman is the co-founder of Queen Bee Biz. As a life coach and emotional releasing expert, she along with her business partner, Vicki Kallman, support women over 40 to Bee Happy before during and after menopause. They take you from Grumpy to Happy in 60 seconds! Click here for 24/7 happiness.
As Ambassadors for Happiness, we support amazing women over 40 to be emotional ready to have fun and Bee Happy before, during, and after the “Big Change”. 4 Weeks to Muzzle the Menopause Mess! Click here to show you how